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Mar 10

Mojave House

Subject Line Says

Dear Readers,

I get the most sensational texts and emails from my sweet kiddo… who is also 14 and a girl – so everything is sensational. Good, bad or ugly, being sensationalized is just the way of life for a teen girl. Last week at work I got an email from her about a new weight loss supplement that Dr. Oz was pitching. I didn’t know she watched, Dr. Oz. 

Subject line: burn fat quicker & more efficiently.

Email: PLEASE can we please get Garcinia Cambogia Extract and become thin and healthy and fit together please. People comment on all of the links and posts about it saying that it worked brilliantly for them and so many good things. The only thing is I’m not sure how expensive it is. I’m sure if it’s expensive that you can find coupons or get a discount because you’re a benefits director. I think this will help us bond too.

OK – I love the part about getting coupons and bonding. Frankly, as much as this kid says she despise me… that’s how much I love her. She is so much fun. I read this email at work and started laughing out loud – bonding over Garcinia Cambogia Extract! I wonder if I can replace this with family therapy? It seems cheaper. $37.98 USD for 60 pills…. That’s like a whole month for less than one therapy session!

Food and I battled for most of 2012. Either I was eating too little or too much. There was probably a day or two all was A-OK. But just a day or two… maybe more. Subsequently, I lost a LOT of weight down to my lowest ever and then added 30 pounds to the low. I kinda liked the lowest ever, although I’m told I looked gaunt. Whatever. I was thin – and I liked being 5′ 11″ and thin!

Other than watching Dr. Oz – my daughter is also a Dr. Phil and Tyra Banks, America’s Next Top Model hard care addict. Man – I’d love to get her on both of those shows! Dr. P can tell her that her ma’ isn’t half bad and Tyra can talk to her about frying her hair with cheap dye… Maybe they can tag team her? Idea worth exploring.

On the weekends, you can hear gut wrencing scream-o metal bands and Tyra Banks, Dr. Phil and Dr. Oz loud (and I mean LOUD) and clear from under her bedroom door all weekend long. Imagine what that combo is like. Haha… sounds like something right out of Oz! Intermittently over the weekend, I get emails from her (from 20 feet down the hallway) about how we should be eating differently (agree), hair product that will make her hair better, shampoo that Tyra uses so you don’t have to take a shower (I really want her to shower…), the ways Tyra says make-up should be applied – and she thinks I should be paying attention to this information… Oh, and many, many fashion tips since my fashion sense is so bad (agree).

I’m a little concerned I’m getting fashion and weight loss tips from Tyra and Dr. Oz via a 14 year old girl from an internet connection 20 feet down the hallway… keeping an eye on that one, for sure. Have to say though, if that kid of mine and I can bond over a bottle of supplements that do no harm and cost less than a therapy session – I’m so on that. Therapy too… oh, and still praying to the good lord little baby Jesus Christ, Buddha, and calling in all those angels. Because although they aren’t helping with burning all this fat off my big fat ass, they do bring me some peace and serenity during each day of raising my sweet kiddo. Thank God for that!

Namaste,

Joie

Jan 13

DC CA Poppies w Others

I Used Pledge

Dear Readers,

I remember it like it was yesterday – my first record album was given to me for my 14th birthday – a Cher album that had a song on it about eating crackers in bed. I don’t remember the name of the album, but I remember how incredibly happy I was to have my very own shiny black disc… soon to gather dust. The thrill of having the album faded after realizing I had nothing else to listen to and I was getting bored of Cher (gasp!). Eventually I abandoned Cher and left her laying on the turn table, patiently waiting for me to spin her round again. Enough days passed, maybe even weeks, for a thin layer of dust to have gathered on my shiny black disc – so… what do you do when dust gathers? Well, I was in charge of dusting the house at 14 years old – I got the Pledge and a dust rag and wiped it away! Yeah… not so much. My dad walked in on me while I was carefully making Cher sparkle more than she already did – or does – and said, “Oh my god – what are you doing?!” I got a stern lecture about grooves, wax, dust jackets, putting my things away and to stop being a knuckle head. Oh yeah, and to never EVER touch any of his records.

It’s interesting how we do things we think make perfectt logical sense at the time, only later to find out it was the most absurd way of handling a situation… or comical, quizzical, or maybe just different. I guess it’s how we learn. Right? When we do these things generally we have to stumble and maybe fall – and hopefully get back up and move forward. I think about this path I’m on now that I keep referring to as my new spiritual path and realized today – it’s not new. I’ve been on it all of my life. I’m just becoming aware of it in a much bigger way. I was at a service today led by Jesse Brune and Jennifer Hadley and Jesse shared something he learned from Jennifer. Essentially he said the only thing we should be concerned about being successful at is our spiritual growth. I totally get that. If our connection to our higher power grows – everything else really will just fall in line. Won’t it? I believe it will. And that higher power can be whatever you call it – God, Buddha, Allah, or any other name that resonates with you. For me, it’s usually just, “God.”

I was at peace today. I don’t know where my path is leading me and know each day will show me new challenges – but I’m good because each day I know I’m better equipped to take on those challenges because I have people in my life who are also more aware of their spiritual paths. Those paths don’t include preaching hell and damnation; they don’t include judging; they don’t include manipulations and greed. They simply include the process of giving and receiving love and sharing a positive flow of energy.

Namaste,

Joie

 

Jan 9

Mojave Sunset Dec 30, 2012
1 Comment

Holy Alter Fire of Love

Dear Readers,

I just started taking this totally rad class called, Masterful Living, taught by Rev. Jennifer Hadley. Wayyyyy back ago when I first started my blog (I’m sorry I’ve been absent), I talked about the Rev., and then I got sidetracked by animal guides, psychics, and a bajillion other metaphysical intel. OK – all of the above, I’m still on board with – but all at once was too overwhelming and frankly – I crashed. So I’m back to A Course in Miracles and Rev. Jennifer Hadley who is the radest of the rad.

So to sum up the course… oh goodness… I couldn’t do it. I guess it’s about becoming more conscious about how Love conquers all. And that we are all one, so if we all love – we’ll all heal. And… hmm… OK guys, it’s only January 9 so we’re 9 days in and you’re going to need to cut me a little slack here – I will write more about it soon – it’s 52 weeks long. Not an after-thought, but God is for sure involved as well. There are exercises and homework which I’ve found very helpful – especially the forgiveness letter AND a great community of folks from all over the world!

So I’ve been trying REAL hard to be more loving, non-judgmental, Christ conscious, forgiving… etc… REALLY hard. Maybe too hard? Because I was tested today and failed with a great big F – oh and I used a word that started with the letter f as well (more than 1x), and it wasn’t farfegnugen. I’m told that once we really commit to leading a more holy existence, then God will put roadblocks in our way to test us. Really? That doesn’t sound very holy or God like to me. I really think I may have just had a crappy day.

So I keep listening to the Rev talk about the holy alter fire of love (LOVE that saying) saying my prayers at night (and whenever I feel like it) and having little chats with myself – saying things like, “Hmm… how do I know it’s what I want or what God wants me to hear?” Good grief. This is more complicated than I thought it would be. As my cute little winter friend says, “fer sure, dude.” Whatever… I’ll just keep starting over every time my brain explodes because of a perception (ACIM says it’s a false perception) and ask for patience, love, patience, love, patience… I guess if my dog can wait all day for me to come home so he can go out and piddle, I can be patient with myself each time I slip and say words that start with the letter, f.

Fer sure, dude.

Joie

Aug 28

Myakka Blue Bird

No Kitty… Yet…

Dear Readers,

Today would have been a normal work day but then not so much because I was being spammed by my daughter via text message with pictures of the perfect kittens (they changed by the hour) and the most rational reasons why I should leave work, hop in the car and go to Santa Ana to get one that she tried to sell by texting, “Really, mom – it’s going to end up at the pound anyway – so why don’t we just go get it?” My bad. Of course, why not?

By 8 p.m., I had gone to four pet stores and the animal shelter, which is of course closed on Tuesdays! We saw three more cats in the PetSmart adoption centers that warranted, “It’s the perfect cat mom!” Luckily, I kept my wits because they were cute, but not the perfect cats. Ah, but the animal shelter is open on, Wednesdays. Tomorrow, I’ll be sitting on my nice new couch wondering how many scratching posts I need to buy in order for this couch to remain “nice” and watching my dog try to figure out what the heck has entered his house. Should be a super fun night. Does anyone want to take bets that my daughter will open my door around 1 a.m. and throw that kitten in my room so she can sleep? No? Didn’t think so…

I tell my daughter I’m not a cat person, but between you me and the apple tree, I’ve owned six or seven cats in my lifetime. I think they are super cute, love their personalities, and I had one kitten that when I just glanced her way, she started purring like a monster truck – her name was, Maude. I loved that cat. So – yes, I like cats. But I still want to make sure that cat goes bye-bye when my sweet kiddo moves to Nashville to be a rock-star (her destination of choice). I like freedom more – that comes with no pets. Ah… freedom… ever elusive. Alas… until I no longer have a home-bound sweet teenager, a needy dog and soon a kitten who is probably going to try and climb up my leg and cause me to bleed by pouncing on my fingers – freedom will be out of reach.

OK – so, I’m off to dream about freedom.

Namaste to you all!

Joie

Aug 27

Bear and Kodie

OK… I’m a Sap

Dear Readers,

Never be said that I’m not a total, sap. What do I mean by this? My daughter can pretty much convince me of her grandiose needs through one of her persuasive letters – frankly, because they are so darn sweet and funny… and passionate.

About six, seven, or eight months ago we got a kitten named, Kody. This is a picture of my dog who is barely out of being a puppy and Kody wrestling. They did this all day long… Note – the kitten was not being hurt, she beat the crud out of the dog – he was very gentle with her. A month went by and we no longer had Kody due to lack of responsibility – but found her an AWESOME home. I’m pretty sure before the end of the week we’ll be getting another kitten mostly because my sweet kiddo has convinced me it’ll be different this time and she has, “grown”. This is just a short excerpt from one of many written communications she has sent me about cats she is seeing online: ”He’s adorable and fluffy and sweet and house-trained. I’m going to clean my room today and do the dishwasher and whatever you’d like me to do. You have no idea, though maybe a small one, of how happy I will be and how much happier and lighter I will be with him or a cat/kitten in general. You have no idea how much I love this cat, I’m already attached to him and loving him. Plus we have a cat brush.” I mean… we have a cat brush.

Yeah. I’m a sap. I know… I’ll be cleaning the litter-box myself after a day or two. I’ll be waking up again with the kitten tossed into my room at midnight because my kiddo can’t sleep. I’ll be telling my dog to stop chewing on the kitten’s head. I’ll be saying, it’s your cat – not mine, about 100x a day. But – here are the pros.

  1. The dishwasher will be emptied by someone other than me at least twice this year.
  2. The kid’s room will be clean once this year.
  3. The kid will be happier, lighter, and I’ll get some more of these terrific emails.
  4. The dog will have a playmate.
  5. We’ll be rescuing a kittie.
  6. We’ll have a use for the cat brush. I mean really, what was I thinking not having a cat to go with the brush? Seriously…

Namaste,

Joie

A painted hindsight gloves a chocolate past the hungry plastic.

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